September 27, 2006
And time goes on. I see that it has been a couple of days since last I wrote. Hard to believe – though I admit to being so tired that time is not looking the same. Yesterday morning, for example, I ‘awoke’ (if that is the right word since sleeping was little done), to discover that I had made ‘coffee’ but forgotten the coffee part. Yes, I set up the auto-drip system, put the water in… and so we had a nice, hot pot of water at 4:45 am. Sigh. I keep telling myself that it will get better. It has to do, don’t you think?
Anyway, have a few new stories to add to the list. Here is one that you might appreciate – though at the time, I don’t know that I found it as funny!
The other evening I was getting Xander ready for bed. I was tired and crotchety, to say the least. No surprise then that when Jason, full of five year old bounce from his bath with Daddy, came charging into the living room full of news, I was less than enthusiastic. "MOMMY!!! I HAVE AN IDEA!" Jason, wait please. I am trying (Grunt) to get your brother (NO MOMMY NO YOU CAN'T!!!) dressed! (GASP)' "BUT MOMMY, I HAVE AN IDEA AND I DISCUSSED IT WITH DADDY AND HE THINKS ITS A GOOD IDEA BUT HE SAID YOU HAD TO AGREE!" Jason, NOT NOW!'(Grabbing a squirming yelling bundle of Xander as he launched himself from the changing table). Downcast, he waited. Then,'Now Mommy?' 'What is it, Jason?' 'Well, I thought that I could get PLUSES when I was GOOD and when I wasn't good then I wouldn't get any and Icould save them up!' (Xander was yelling now because he didn't WANT to be dressed!) 'Jason, I will think about it but not right no... W!' "But Mommy, it is a REALLY GOOD IDEA and it will help me learn..." 'Jason' "MOMMY!" 'I am not going to discuss anything right now, not this, not philosophy, not NOW!" (GRUNT). Jason tilted his head and said, blue eyes limpid, 'When do you want to discuss philosophy Mommy?' Tom, who had had his own struggles going, getting Jason dressed while Jason was trying to talk with me said firmly, 'Jason, there are times when you should just drop a subject and this is one of them!' We bundled the boys off to bed but the subject was not finished. Just as he was dropping off to sleep, Jason said 'Mommy, think about it tonight and you can tell me the answer tomorrow.'
I am still tired, though last night was somewhat better than the night before, so I have yet to consider Jason’s suggestion. We will see what happens.
Tomorrow I am to go in for volunteer training – 45 minutes during which I will fill out paperwork and watch two videos. Once that is all done – and the approval goes through – then I shall be able to (1)volunteer to help in the classroom, (2)help with field trips and/or (3)attend class parties. Should be interesting, at any rate. Donna has kindly agreed to come out and stay with Xander while I do this. She has also suggested that I take the time between the end of training and picking Jason up (about 50 minutes, I think) and go do something for myself. I have agreed. Think I will hit the library, maybe get some writing done. Sigh again.
Other stories: Well, Xander’s ‘one day’ phrase is getting quite a work out. Today he looked at me thoughtfully and said ‘One day, when I be big boy, I won’t be little boy anymore.’ ‘Ah,’ I responded, ‘And when you aren’t a little boy, what will you be?’ He looked a bit exasperated and said ‘I be big boy, Mommy!’ I had to laugh at him, he was sooooo serious. It does seem to be a serious topic with him these days, however, so perhaps I shouldn’t laugh.
The good news is that the cold seems to be going away. His nose is still runny but the stuff coming out is not green and his cough, while it does sound awful, does not sound nearly as bad as did. He took a two hour nap yesterday and slept from 7:48 – 12:00 last night, woke briefly to ask for water, then slept until 3:30 when he began a waking ‘thing’ He finally went completely back to sleep about 5 am, after I picked him up and rocked him a bit, and then he slept until nearly 7:30 am.
Breaking news is that Tom is being transferred to a new job – Did I mention this? He will be working in propulsion systems. When I asked about job security – a big issue when one works for Boeing – he said that as long as Boeing was putting engines in airplanes, propulsion systems would be around. He will have a longer commute since PropSys is up at Boeing field in Seattle but it won’t be nearly as long as if he had to drive to Everett each day.
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
September 25 letter
September 25, 2006
Back again – so tired I could cry. Xander has gotten another of his colds. At first his sleep was disturbed by these really awful sounding coughs. I dosed him with Albuterol and saline and cough meds at night and that stopped being the problem but then he began having nightmares – because even with all the stuff and the humidifier going, he still was horribly congested. So the nights have been disrupted, to say the least. This morning, however, it is Jason who woke at 4:45 am. Sigh. The real problem is that, without sufficient sleep, we all become grumpy.
At any rate, Jason is enjoying school. ‘I have two girl friends’ he tells me solemnly. And whenever he thinks about not going to school, for fear that he is missing something fun at home, I suppose, he generally decides that he really SHOULD go to school – ‘otherwise Brooke and Taylor will miss me.’
Looking back, I realize that I have not told you one of my favorite Jason school stories: I asked Jason the other day about playing with boys – since his companions appear to be all girls. He sighed deeply and shook his head. ‘I am having trouble putting the boy troop together.’ He said, blue eyes pensive. ‘I do have one helper, he is my executive sergeant.’ I blinked, a bit surprised at the language. ‘Your executive sergeant?’ I repeated dumbly. ‘Yes,’ he said, ‘he sits beside me on the playground and we discuss strategy. When we need another person on the field, I send him in.’ ‘Don’t you play on the field?’ I asked, rather concerned at the image. He looked VERY patiently at me. ‘No, mommy. I’m the general. I am too important.’ ‘What precisely does the general do?’ I asked, fascinated despite myself. ‘He watches the action and when more soldiers are needed, he sends them in. Of course, I am a better general than the last one.’ ‘Really’ I said, curious to see where this was leading. ‘Oh yes,’ he nodded, ‘I hold planning meetings. I get everyone together, we discuss situations, decide what to do and then go and do it. The last general before me just sent men in.’ ‘Ah’ was all I could come up with as a response. What do you say to such a statement, after all? What puzzles me is where he is getting the military language…
Other than that, Jason has been playing soccer. The first two games were all his. In the first game, several Saturdays ago, he scored all three goals for his team. Then weekend before last, he scored all five goals. He was amazing to watch, not aggressively shoving to get the ball, just slipping his foot into the scrum, sneaking the ball out with his toe and then dribbling it down to the goal while all the kids in the scrum looked about in confusion –‘where’d the ball go?’ This past Saturday, however, he was very down in the weather – so tired that you could see it when he walked and played. He did well in picking himself up from knock downs but he was not in top form. Neither was Xander, what with the cold, but while he was watching from the sidelines, he conceived a new desire. ‘One day’ he told Jason’s coach solemnly, ‘I be played on soccer team with my big bahbah.’ Of course, earlier that day, as he watched me cut up oranges for the half time snack, he had told me ‘One day (his current favorite introductory phrase!) I be play on bunk ball team and you make orni for me.’ So we have the forecast for Xander’s future. As to Jason’s soccer career, who knows? As I said, he is not an ‘aggressive’ player – he doesn’t bludgeon his way in the way his teammates do but for all that, he has his foot on the ball a greater percentage of the time. So we will see. Tom is generally very impressed with him and so are others who watch the games. It amuses me no end because I have one friend who, when Jason was much littler and learning to walk, looked at him and said ‘You will just have to accept that Jason won’t be much of an athlete.’ (This based on the fact that his static balance sucked. His dynamic balance, on the other hand, is remarkable.) The truth that I have come to accept is that when Jason gets focused on something, he is quite capable of learning whatever that something is. His ability to focus is astonishing.
This weekend, and the one previous, Tom has been working on widening the front walkway. With the help of a friend, John Rose, and with Jason’s kind assistance, Tom dug two trenches, one on either side of the sidewalk, filled them with gravel and sand and laid down paving stones. His next project is to build a walkway across in front of the house. Then he will set to work on the raised bed for my roses. We plan to put in an arbor over the walkway as well. When it is done, it should be quite attractive. But it is work and it is time and it is most definitely money. On the other hand, the roses have been waiting for over a year – Tom had promised me a rose garden for my last birthday but one… I will have to take pictures and send them off once the work is more complete.
Hmmm… what other news? Well, it appears that Matt and family will be making the long trek from Minnesota to Tucson for Christmas. They are looking into doing it by train. That is brave. Trains are wonderful, no doubt, but they are a lot of work – what with having to get luggage on and off yourself and given that there is no direct route from Minnesota to Arizona, they will be doing that a lot. That isn’t so big a deal, if you are one person – or even a couple of adults but two adults and three little people, one of whom is newly born. Yikes. On the other hand, my brother and sister-in-law are quite the intrepid couple. I am sure that it will go well for them. Much as we would like to, we will not be joining them in Tucson this year. Too many bills for house repairs. Course, if we won the lottery… grin. Not likely, especially without a ticket!
Back again – so tired I could cry. Xander has gotten another of his colds. At first his sleep was disturbed by these really awful sounding coughs. I dosed him with Albuterol and saline and cough meds at night and that stopped being the problem but then he began having nightmares – because even with all the stuff and the humidifier going, he still was horribly congested. So the nights have been disrupted, to say the least. This morning, however, it is Jason who woke at 4:45 am. Sigh. The real problem is that, without sufficient sleep, we all become grumpy.
At any rate, Jason is enjoying school. ‘I have two girl friends’ he tells me solemnly. And whenever he thinks about not going to school, for fear that he is missing something fun at home, I suppose, he generally decides that he really SHOULD go to school – ‘otherwise Brooke and Taylor will miss me.’
Looking back, I realize that I have not told you one of my favorite Jason school stories: I asked Jason the other day about playing with boys – since his companions appear to be all girls. He sighed deeply and shook his head. ‘I am having trouble putting the boy troop together.’ He said, blue eyes pensive. ‘I do have one helper, he is my executive sergeant.’ I blinked, a bit surprised at the language. ‘Your executive sergeant?’ I repeated dumbly. ‘Yes,’ he said, ‘he sits beside me on the playground and we discuss strategy. When we need another person on the field, I send him in.’ ‘Don’t you play on the field?’ I asked, rather concerned at the image. He looked VERY patiently at me. ‘No, mommy. I’m the general. I am too important.’ ‘What precisely does the general do?’ I asked, fascinated despite myself. ‘He watches the action and when more soldiers are needed, he sends them in. Of course, I am a better general than the last one.’ ‘Really’ I said, curious to see where this was leading. ‘Oh yes,’ he nodded, ‘I hold planning meetings. I get everyone together, we discuss situations, decide what to do and then go and do it. The last general before me just sent men in.’ ‘Ah’ was all I could come up with as a response. What do you say to such a statement, after all? What puzzles me is where he is getting the military language…
Other than that, Jason has been playing soccer. The first two games were all his. In the first game, several Saturdays ago, he scored all three goals for his team. Then weekend before last, he scored all five goals. He was amazing to watch, not aggressively shoving to get the ball, just slipping his foot into the scrum, sneaking the ball out with his toe and then dribbling it down to the goal while all the kids in the scrum looked about in confusion –‘where’d the ball go?’ This past Saturday, however, he was very down in the weather – so tired that you could see it when he walked and played. He did well in picking himself up from knock downs but he was not in top form. Neither was Xander, what with the cold, but while he was watching from the sidelines, he conceived a new desire. ‘One day’ he told Jason’s coach solemnly, ‘I be played on soccer team with my big bahbah.’ Of course, earlier that day, as he watched me cut up oranges for the half time snack, he had told me ‘One day (his current favorite introductory phrase!) I be play on bunk ball team and you make orni for me.’ So we have the forecast for Xander’s future. As to Jason’s soccer career, who knows? As I said, he is not an ‘aggressive’ player – he doesn’t bludgeon his way in the way his teammates do but for all that, he has his foot on the ball a greater percentage of the time. So we will see. Tom is generally very impressed with him and so are others who watch the games. It amuses me no end because I have one friend who, when Jason was much littler and learning to walk, looked at him and said ‘You will just have to accept that Jason won’t be much of an athlete.’ (This based on the fact that his static balance sucked. His dynamic balance, on the other hand, is remarkable.) The truth that I have come to accept is that when Jason gets focused on something, he is quite capable of learning whatever that something is. His ability to focus is astonishing.
This weekend, and the one previous, Tom has been working on widening the front walkway. With the help of a friend, John Rose, and with Jason’s kind assistance, Tom dug two trenches, one on either side of the sidewalk, filled them with gravel and sand and laid down paving stones. His next project is to build a walkway across in front of the house. Then he will set to work on the raised bed for my roses. We plan to put in an arbor over the walkway as well. When it is done, it should be quite attractive. But it is work and it is time and it is most definitely money. On the other hand, the roses have been waiting for over a year – Tom had promised me a rose garden for my last birthday but one… I will have to take pictures and send them off once the work is more complete.
Hmmm… what other news? Well, it appears that Matt and family will be making the long trek from Minnesota to Tucson for Christmas. They are looking into doing it by train. That is brave. Trains are wonderful, no doubt, but they are a lot of work – what with having to get luggage on and off yourself and given that there is no direct route from Minnesota to Arizona, they will be doing that a lot. That isn’t so big a deal, if you are one person – or even a couple of adults but two adults and three little people, one of whom is newly born. Yikes. On the other hand, my brother and sister-in-law are quite the intrepid couple. I am sure that it will go well for them. Much as we would like to, we will not be joining them in Tucson this year. Too many bills for house repairs. Course, if we won the lottery… grin. Not likely, especially without a ticket!
September 20 letter
September 20, 2006
Has it only been a week since last I wrote? Amazing. It feels like it has been longer, or at any rate, that I have aged dramatically in the intervening period! Jason has now been in school for almost two weeks. The bus riding experiment appears to have been a failure. Jason informed me that there are too many people on the bus – and given the fact that when I went to meet him at school, he was amongst the last to get to his class, I take that to mean that when it comes time to get off the bus, the bigger kids crowd up and off first. He gets disoriented in the swirling masses and has to go find a bus monitor to get him redirected to class. I am proud of him that he figured out what to do and how to handle the situation but there is, at least at present, no need for him to continue to do so. Xander is much happier taking Jason to school. Jason is happier having us take him. Seems the solution is right there before me.
And that reminds me of something that happened yesterday that still has me smiling. Xander was a very tired little boy yesterday. Everything reduced him to tears – the clothes he had on, the food he ate, the toys he was playing with, but most especially saying ‘goodbye’ to his big brother. Jason was distressed by Xander’s tears and said ‘Xander, you have to let me go to school – I promise I will make you something special but I can only do that if I go to school.’ Xander was not mollified but Jason went off to class anyway. That afternoon, when we came to collect Jason, he came marching up to us, all smiles. ‘I have something special for Xander in my backpack’ he said, fishing inside it. ‘Let’s wait until we get home’ I suggested. Jason was not entirely satisfied with this but he waited. The moment we got home, he stopped inside the doorway and opened his backpack. Reaching in, he pulled out… a book! The school had had a bookfair and I had given him some money to buy a couple of books for himself. He had done so but he had also gone looking for a book for his brother. Xander was so delighted with the book that (1)I had to read it to him immediately and (2)he took it to bed with him when he went down for his nap – he fell asleep still holding on to it. Jason is amazing. It was such a sweet and thoughtful thing to do and it meant the world to his little brother.
I am sure that there are other tales to tell from the past week. The sad thing is that I am so tired at the moment, I have a hard time typing, let alone remembering what happened in the recent past. Last night was hard – the stereo in the boys’ room decided to quit so I had to go in, after they were asleep, and bang around setting up a new one. Then multiple times during the night, one or the other of the boys cried out with nightmares. That meant, of course, that I was up and down about every hour/hour and a half, soothing a child. Jason, who usually sleeps until 7, awoke at 4:40 this morning. Xander, who usually wakes about this time, is still asleep. Sigh. We will see how the day goes. The extra bedroom is pretty much ready. All we have to do is to move the crib. Then Xander will have his own room and there won’t be the concern that one boy will wake the other. Tom is not convinced that this is the best solution. He would rather keep the room as a playroom, a place to locate all the toys that have taken over the living room but then, he is not the one who has to get up repeatedly during the night to quite the boys so they don’t wake each other. I am hoping that, once they are apart, they will start sleeping better and maybe, just maybe, we will be able to move them back into the same room. Wish us luck.
We are here in Maple Valley for at least another year or two. I am rather dreading that, truth be told. There has been so much new construction in the area and the surface roads are not designed to handle the traffic flow. Already the road into MV from Renton is getting worse and worse. I dread to think what it will be like once the three new housing projects are finished and filled. Moreover, while the Tahoma School district currently has a good reputation, that is subject to change. Kent used to be good then there was huge influx of people who wanted to take advantage of it – but there was not enough money to handle the sudden overflow of students and so the district fell very far down the scale. Ah well, we will see what we will see.
Has it only been a week since last I wrote? Amazing. It feels like it has been longer, or at any rate, that I have aged dramatically in the intervening period! Jason has now been in school for almost two weeks. The bus riding experiment appears to have been a failure. Jason informed me that there are too many people on the bus – and given the fact that when I went to meet him at school, he was amongst the last to get to his class, I take that to mean that when it comes time to get off the bus, the bigger kids crowd up and off first. He gets disoriented in the swirling masses and has to go find a bus monitor to get him redirected to class. I am proud of him that he figured out what to do and how to handle the situation but there is, at least at present, no need for him to continue to do so. Xander is much happier taking Jason to school. Jason is happier having us take him. Seems the solution is right there before me.
And that reminds me of something that happened yesterday that still has me smiling. Xander was a very tired little boy yesterday. Everything reduced him to tears – the clothes he had on, the food he ate, the toys he was playing with, but most especially saying ‘goodbye’ to his big brother. Jason was distressed by Xander’s tears and said ‘Xander, you have to let me go to school – I promise I will make you something special but I can only do that if I go to school.’ Xander was not mollified but Jason went off to class anyway. That afternoon, when we came to collect Jason, he came marching up to us, all smiles. ‘I have something special for Xander in my backpack’ he said, fishing inside it. ‘Let’s wait until we get home’ I suggested. Jason was not entirely satisfied with this but he waited. The moment we got home, he stopped inside the doorway and opened his backpack. Reaching in, he pulled out… a book! The school had had a bookfair and I had given him some money to buy a couple of books for himself. He had done so but he had also gone looking for a book for his brother. Xander was so delighted with the book that (1)I had to read it to him immediately and (2)he took it to bed with him when he went down for his nap – he fell asleep still holding on to it. Jason is amazing. It was such a sweet and thoughtful thing to do and it meant the world to his little brother.
I am sure that there are other tales to tell from the past week. The sad thing is that I am so tired at the moment, I have a hard time typing, let alone remembering what happened in the recent past. Last night was hard – the stereo in the boys’ room decided to quit so I had to go in, after they were asleep, and bang around setting up a new one. Then multiple times during the night, one or the other of the boys cried out with nightmares. That meant, of course, that I was up and down about every hour/hour and a half, soothing a child. Jason, who usually sleeps until 7, awoke at 4:40 this morning. Xander, who usually wakes about this time, is still asleep. Sigh. We will see how the day goes. The extra bedroom is pretty much ready. All we have to do is to move the crib. Then Xander will have his own room and there won’t be the concern that one boy will wake the other. Tom is not convinced that this is the best solution. He would rather keep the room as a playroom, a place to locate all the toys that have taken over the living room but then, he is not the one who has to get up repeatedly during the night to quite the boys so they don’t wake each other. I am hoping that, once they are apart, they will start sleeping better and maybe, just maybe, we will be able to move them back into the same room. Wish us luck.
We are here in Maple Valley for at least another year or two. I am rather dreading that, truth be told. There has been so much new construction in the area and the surface roads are not designed to handle the traffic flow. Already the road into MV from Renton is getting worse and worse. I dread to think what it will be like once the three new housing projects are finished and filled. Moreover, while the Tahoma School district currently has a good reputation, that is subject to change. Kent used to be good then there was huge influx of people who wanted to take advantage of it – but there was not enough money to handle the sudden overflow of students and so the district fell very far down the scale. Ah well, we will see what we will see.
September 11, 2006
September 11, 2006
Oh heavens! It is weird how some days are forever engraved into your memory – your visual memory. For me, there are two ‘horrible’ days and two ‘wonderful’ days. The Challenger explosion is seared into my mind’s eye as is the image of the Towers. I remember with Challenger that the UH had splurged and bought a HUGE screen to show the launch. Everyone on the islands was excited as a local boy, Ellison Onizuka, was flying the shuttle. And then… the explosion. I had just walked into the library and had stopped to watch the launch along with a host of other people. For a moment there was absolute silence. No one could believe what had just happened. We stared and, I suspect, all hoped that it was a mistake, a horrible hoax, but then the announcer began to shriek and the moment of paralysis faded and the horror set in. The Challenger was gone. Something of the same sensation hit me when I saw the films of the Towers. I was blithely cleaning up around the apartment that Tom and I shared at the time. It was morning and I had a baby and many minor things to do. Then a phone call: Have you seen the news? I said ‘No’ – I rarely watched the news. It was all too depressing and not the way I wanted to start the day. My friend said ‘Turn it on. Now.’ So, puzzled, I did. And I saw the films. And I couldn’t believe it. It was a scene from a bad Hollywood film, surely. I kept believing that as I gathered up the baby and ran downstairs to my friend’s apartment. She opened the door as I arrived and I said, shaking, ‘its not real, right?’ Her eyes were as horror-filled as my own must’ve been. ‘Its real. They don’t have the death toll yet.’ Gods. All I could think was ‘My baby. What a world I have brought my baby into.’
Then again, the two wonderful days are what one might expect – the days my babies were born. Oh, of course, Jason was born at midnight so he managed to straddle days… Grin. Will never forget how both Tom and the OBGYN agreed that Jason had perfect timing. He was born AFTER Dr. Faulkner’s son’s birthday party – so she was able to be there and he was born BEFORE Tom had to go to work on Monday – so he could take the whole week off. And he was born rapidly – though I will admit, the labor pains didn’t feel ‘rapid’ in the sense of short-lived. While they were going on, they seemed never ending! But four hours and eight minutes is not so bad, all in all. Then there was Xander… Born in the afternoon, again, not a bad time. He was fast too though as my mother delights in pointing out, he was helped a bit, what with the doc rupturing the membranes. Of course I have been assured by friends with more child bearing experience, that doesn’t always work. In Xander’s case, though, it did. Two hours and twelve minutes and there he was, mad as mad could be that someone had interrupted his rest. I was lucky. Both labors were ‘normal’ and both boys healthy and WIDE awake at birth. To this day I am astonished to think that I had anything to do with their existence. They are such complete people already and were, in some sense, from birth. I guess the Universe mitigates horror with joy…
Ah but let me continue in the saga of those boys: Today, as well as being September 11, is the second day of Jason’s kindergarten. Again, Xander and I will put him on the bus – and, no doubt, again Xander will be furious and upset that his baba is leaving without him. He adores his brother and his brother adores him, even when sibling rivalry rears its head and bites them both. Yesterday was a good example of the former. Xander was in an especially loving mood and went around hugging everyone, his big brother included. (Actually, for quite awhile, his big brother was the sole focus. Xander would fling himself on his brother from behind, shrieking ‘BABA’ and hug Jason fiercely. Jason was not entirely pleased with that, but not entirely displeased. ‘I don’t like being grabbed from behind, Xander!’ he finally said. Xander laughed and flung himself forward and Jason, deciding that, if you can’t beat them… turned around just in time to catch him in an equally fierce hug. The two boys tumbled, giggling, to the floor.) It was lovely to watch.
Oh heavens! It is weird how some days are forever engraved into your memory – your visual memory. For me, there are two ‘horrible’ days and two ‘wonderful’ days. The Challenger explosion is seared into my mind’s eye as is the image of the Towers. I remember with Challenger that the UH had splurged and bought a HUGE screen to show the launch. Everyone on the islands was excited as a local boy, Ellison Onizuka, was flying the shuttle. And then… the explosion. I had just walked into the library and had stopped to watch the launch along with a host of other people. For a moment there was absolute silence. No one could believe what had just happened. We stared and, I suspect, all hoped that it was a mistake, a horrible hoax, but then the announcer began to shriek and the moment of paralysis faded and the horror set in. The Challenger was gone. Something of the same sensation hit me when I saw the films of the Towers. I was blithely cleaning up around the apartment that Tom and I shared at the time. It was morning and I had a baby and many minor things to do. Then a phone call: Have you seen the news? I said ‘No’ – I rarely watched the news. It was all too depressing and not the way I wanted to start the day. My friend said ‘Turn it on. Now.’ So, puzzled, I did. And I saw the films. And I couldn’t believe it. It was a scene from a bad Hollywood film, surely. I kept believing that as I gathered up the baby and ran downstairs to my friend’s apartment. She opened the door as I arrived and I said, shaking, ‘its not real, right?’ Her eyes were as horror-filled as my own must’ve been. ‘Its real. They don’t have the death toll yet.’ Gods. All I could think was ‘My baby. What a world I have brought my baby into.’
Then again, the two wonderful days are what one might expect – the days my babies were born. Oh, of course, Jason was born at midnight so he managed to straddle days… Grin. Will never forget how both Tom and the OBGYN agreed that Jason had perfect timing. He was born AFTER Dr. Faulkner’s son’s birthday party – so she was able to be there and he was born BEFORE Tom had to go to work on Monday – so he could take the whole week off. And he was born rapidly – though I will admit, the labor pains didn’t feel ‘rapid’ in the sense of short-lived. While they were going on, they seemed never ending! But four hours and eight minutes is not so bad, all in all. Then there was Xander… Born in the afternoon, again, not a bad time. He was fast too though as my mother delights in pointing out, he was helped a bit, what with the doc rupturing the membranes. Of course I have been assured by friends with more child bearing experience, that doesn’t always work. In Xander’s case, though, it did. Two hours and twelve minutes and there he was, mad as mad could be that someone had interrupted his rest. I was lucky. Both labors were ‘normal’ and both boys healthy and WIDE awake at birth. To this day I am astonished to think that I had anything to do with their existence. They are such complete people already and were, in some sense, from birth. I guess the Universe mitigates horror with joy…
Ah but let me continue in the saga of those boys: Today, as well as being September 11, is the second day of Jason’s kindergarten. Again, Xander and I will put him on the bus – and, no doubt, again Xander will be furious and upset that his baba is leaving without him. He adores his brother and his brother adores him, even when sibling rivalry rears its head and bites them both. Yesterday was a good example of the former. Xander was in an especially loving mood and went around hugging everyone, his big brother included. (Actually, for quite awhile, his big brother was the sole focus. Xander would fling himself on his brother from behind, shrieking ‘BABA’ and hug Jason fiercely. Jason was not entirely pleased with that, but not entirely displeased. ‘I don’t like being grabbed from behind, Xander!’ he finally said. Xander laughed and flung himself forward and Jason, deciding that, if you can’t beat them… turned around just in time to catch him in an equally fierce hug. The two boys tumbled, giggling, to the floor.) It was lovely to watch.
September 8
September 8, 2006
The day I have dreaded has arrived. Today Jason starts kindergarten at Lake Wilderness. I am nervous for a lot of reasons – not the least of which is the class size, 21 kids and one teacher and, I suspect, at least some of those kids will be special needs kids. Lake Wilderness is THE special needs school in the area. Moreover, this teacher is relatively new to both teaching kindergarten (1 year experience) and to the school district itself. But we will see. And, of course, Jason is to ride the bus to school…
But, shake that off. I have a few funny ‘don’t you just love five year olds’ stories for you. The first occurred while we were out shopping at a local ‘everything’ (i.e. grocery + department) store. Just as we got into line to pay for the groceries, Jason spotted one of his favorite, now ex, classmates. ‘HI ABBEY!’ he yelled. Abbey’s mother pointed at Jason and said ‘Abbey, say Hi to Jason.’ Abbey did. Then her mother got into the line next to ours and the three children – yes, three. You didn’t think Xander could be left out, did you? – began chatting. At one point, apparently, they were discussing setting up a play date and my ever so precious five year old said, solemnly, ‘Yeah, but probably not at my house. It’s a mess!’ Sigh.
Then there was the discussion that Jason and Xander were having in the back of the car the other day. Or rather, Jason was laying out a plan of future attack and Xander was chirping agreement. It went something like this ‘And then you will do this and I will do this and then we will rule the world. Only, we don’t want to rule the world, that’d be too much work, so we will just fix it.’ Xander listened to this philosophical commentary and said ‘Pease give me dat, bah bah?’ Turned out that Jason had a deflating yellow balloon that Xander considered his own. Jason tossed it to him and continued on with his contemplations about life, the universe, and everything. Tom, who was driving, rolled his eyes at me. I just shrugged. What can you do?
Finally, yesterday was ‘orientation.’ Parents and children went to the classroom to meet the teacher and hear something about the way things are going to work. (Turns out that the class numbers are so large that they ended up splitting the orientation session into two separate groups!) While the parents were ‘oriented’ the kids were taken out to the playground. At the end of the session the kids came back – straggled back might be a better description. Some showed up to the front door, some to the back door and my son was no where to be seen. ‘Where is my son?’ I asked the monitor. ‘He probably went with the other class.’ She said resignedly, ‘I’ll go find him.’ And around the corner comes Jason at a run. I took one look at him and said ‘Do you need to use the potty?’ ‘Yes’ he gasped out, his face an alarming shade of red. Off we went. Once his immediate needs had been handled, I asked ‘Why didn’t you tell someone that you needed to use the potty?’ ‘I didn’t know who to ask.’ He replied sensibly. I said ‘Well, in the future you can ask one of the folks in the orange vests or you can ask your teacher.’ ‘What if my teacher is talking to someone else?’ he inquired, his brow wrinkled with concern. ‘Why don’t you ask her?’ I suggested. ‘Okay’ So he marched over to the teacher. She was, in fact, in the middle of talking with someone else but when she had a moment, I said ‘Jason has a question.’ ‘Yes’ she inquired, looking at him expectantly. He asked his question and she nodded. ‘We will be learning sign language.’ She said ‘If you need to use the potty, you make this sign and I will tell you that you can go with this sign.’ I held my tongue but it occurred to me that whether one was using sign or speech, in order for a need or concern to be communicated, both people need to be aware of each other. If the teacher is, in fact, concentrating on what another person is saying, how likely is it that she will be looking up and able to see a ‘sign’? Ah well. Time will tell. I did explain to her that when Jason says he needs to go, he NEEDS to go. It isn’t a ‘wait until it is convenient’ sort of situation. Hopefully she will keep that in mind. Just in case, I am sending a change of clothes.
As for Xander, he continues to be amazing. Yesterday, when we were outside, he announced to me that he was a ‘baby spiderweb’ and I was a ‘mommy spiderweb’ and I, the mommy spiderweb was to push the baby spider web in swing. I am an obedient mommy, in whatever incarnation, so I obeyed. What else was I to do? I have learned, from watching interactions between Jason and Xander, that arguing personalities with Xander doesn’t work… The other day, Xander told Jason ‘No’ over some subject and Jason was just devastated. I asked him what was wrong and he said, tears in his voice, that he had wanted to do such and such and Xander had said ‘No!’ Tom looked at me in exasperation and asked plaintively, ‘He isn’t bothered when we say ‘no’ – he hardly even acknowledges it but when his brother tells him ‘no’ it is a major catastrophe?’ I explained that Xander had the authority of absolute conviction on his side….
The day I have dreaded has arrived. Today Jason starts kindergarten at Lake Wilderness. I am nervous for a lot of reasons – not the least of which is the class size, 21 kids and one teacher and, I suspect, at least some of those kids will be special needs kids. Lake Wilderness is THE special needs school in the area. Moreover, this teacher is relatively new to both teaching kindergarten (1 year experience) and to the school district itself. But we will see. And, of course, Jason is to ride the bus to school…
But, shake that off. I have a few funny ‘don’t you just love five year olds’ stories for you. The first occurred while we were out shopping at a local ‘everything’ (i.e. grocery + department) store. Just as we got into line to pay for the groceries, Jason spotted one of his favorite, now ex, classmates. ‘HI ABBEY!’ he yelled. Abbey’s mother pointed at Jason and said ‘Abbey, say Hi to Jason.’ Abbey did. Then her mother got into the line next to ours and the three children – yes, three. You didn’t think Xander could be left out, did you? – began chatting. At one point, apparently, they were discussing setting up a play date and my ever so precious five year old said, solemnly, ‘Yeah, but probably not at my house. It’s a mess!’ Sigh.
Then there was the discussion that Jason and Xander were having in the back of the car the other day. Or rather, Jason was laying out a plan of future attack and Xander was chirping agreement. It went something like this ‘And then you will do this and I will do this and then we will rule the world. Only, we don’t want to rule the world, that’d be too much work, so we will just fix it.’ Xander listened to this philosophical commentary and said ‘Pease give me dat, bah bah?’ Turned out that Jason had a deflating yellow balloon that Xander considered his own. Jason tossed it to him and continued on with his contemplations about life, the universe, and everything. Tom, who was driving, rolled his eyes at me. I just shrugged. What can you do?
Finally, yesterday was ‘orientation.’ Parents and children went to the classroom to meet the teacher and hear something about the way things are going to work. (Turns out that the class numbers are so large that they ended up splitting the orientation session into two separate groups!) While the parents were ‘oriented’ the kids were taken out to the playground. At the end of the session the kids came back – straggled back might be a better description. Some showed up to the front door, some to the back door and my son was no where to be seen. ‘Where is my son?’ I asked the monitor. ‘He probably went with the other class.’ She said resignedly, ‘I’ll go find him.’ And around the corner comes Jason at a run. I took one look at him and said ‘Do you need to use the potty?’ ‘Yes’ he gasped out, his face an alarming shade of red. Off we went. Once his immediate needs had been handled, I asked ‘Why didn’t you tell someone that you needed to use the potty?’ ‘I didn’t know who to ask.’ He replied sensibly. I said ‘Well, in the future you can ask one of the folks in the orange vests or you can ask your teacher.’ ‘What if my teacher is talking to someone else?’ he inquired, his brow wrinkled with concern. ‘Why don’t you ask her?’ I suggested. ‘Okay’ So he marched over to the teacher. She was, in fact, in the middle of talking with someone else but when she had a moment, I said ‘Jason has a question.’ ‘Yes’ she inquired, looking at him expectantly. He asked his question and she nodded. ‘We will be learning sign language.’ She said ‘If you need to use the potty, you make this sign and I will tell you that you can go with this sign.’ I held my tongue but it occurred to me that whether one was using sign or speech, in order for a need or concern to be communicated, both people need to be aware of each other. If the teacher is, in fact, concentrating on what another person is saying, how likely is it that she will be looking up and able to see a ‘sign’? Ah well. Time will tell. I did explain to her that when Jason says he needs to go, he NEEDS to go. It isn’t a ‘wait until it is convenient’ sort of situation. Hopefully she will keep that in mind. Just in case, I am sending a change of clothes.
As for Xander, he continues to be amazing. Yesterday, when we were outside, he announced to me that he was a ‘baby spiderweb’ and I was a ‘mommy spiderweb’ and I, the mommy spiderweb was to push the baby spider web in swing. I am an obedient mommy, in whatever incarnation, so I obeyed. What else was I to do? I have learned, from watching interactions between Jason and Xander, that arguing personalities with Xander doesn’t work… The other day, Xander told Jason ‘No’ over some subject and Jason was just devastated. I asked him what was wrong and he said, tears in his voice, that he had wanted to do such and such and Xander had said ‘No!’ Tom looked at me in exasperation and asked plaintively, ‘He isn’t bothered when we say ‘no’ – he hardly even acknowledges it but when his brother tells him ‘no’ it is a major catastrophe?’ I explained that Xander had the authority of absolute conviction on his side….
September 6
September 6, 2006
Don’t know how much time I will have to write this am. I can hear waking noises from my youngest even as I type. He had a bit of a hard night last night – woke at midnight coughing (again), though not the horrible gargling cough of other nights. Then he woke at 3:30 and 4, calling for Mommy. That too was understandable. I had gone away twice yesterday – once to take Jason’s to his kindergarten assessment and once to go have therapy done on my right foot. So he was missing mommy yesterday, even though he had nonna in the morning and daddy in the afternoon.
Just back. Right about 5:30 both boys yelled for me. So I went in. Have spent the last half hour soothing them back down. Both need the sleep. Think I succeeded with Xander. Am not so sure about Jason, though at the moment all is quiet. We will see shortly, no doubt.
As I mentioned, Jason had his assessment yesterday. The teacher, Heather Dean, is young. She had been teaching preschool then took a year and a half off when her son was born before returning to teach kindergarten. We will see how she does. I am a little concerned. There are 21 kids in her class, Lake Wilderness is the magnet school for special needs kids, and … well, we will see. I would be happier if Jason were in a Montessori school. Need to sit this weekend and see about trying to work the budget for that. At any rate the assessment seemed to go well. Jason was his usual bright and funny self. I was seated on the other side of the room, filling out paperwork and laughing softly as I listened to his answers. She asked him, for example, where one begins to read a book and he looked at her in mild astonishment and said ‘Why, at the beginning, of course!’ ‘Where is the beginning?’ she asked him. ‘At the front of the book.’ He answered her, giving her a very odd look. She just nodded and went on to the next series of questions. I suppose those were valid questions. There are languages where the answers would not have been correct. But he was funny…
Don’t know how much time I will have to write this am. I can hear waking noises from my youngest even as I type. He had a bit of a hard night last night – woke at midnight coughing (again), though not the horrible gargling cough of other nights. Then he woke at 3:30 and 4, calling for Mommy. That too was understandable. I had gone away twice yesterday – once to take Jason’s to his kindergarten assessment and once to go have therapy done on my right foot. So he was missing mommy yesterday, even though he had nonna in the morning and daddy in the afternoon.
Just back. Right about 5:30 both boys yelled for me. So I went in. Have spent the last half hour soothing them back down. Both need the sleep. Think I succeeded with Xander. Am not so sure about Jason, though at the moment all is quiet. We will see shortly, no doubt.
As I mentioned, Jason had his assessment yesterday. The teacher, Heather Dean, is young. She had been teaching preschool then took a year and a half off when her son was born before returning to teach kindergarten. We will see how she does. I am a little concerned. There are 21 kids in her class, Lake Wilderness is the magnet school for special needs kids, and … well, we will see. I would be happier if Jason were in a Montessori school. Need to sit this weekend and see about trying to work the budget for that. At any rate the assessment seemed to go well. Jason was his usual bright and funny self. I was seated on the other side of the room, filling out paperwork and laughing softly as I listened to his answers. She asked him, for example, where one begins to read a book and he looked at her in mild astonishment and said ‘Why, at the beginning, of course!’ ‘Where is the beginning?’ she asked him. ‘At the front of the book.’ He answered her, giving her a very odd look. She just nodded and went on to the next series of questions. I suppose those were valid questions. There are languages where the answers would not have been correct. But he was funny…
September 4 letter
September 4, 2006
Labor Day
How weird! It is labor day. Tomorrow Jason goes in for his ‘assessment’, then on Thursday he has his ‘orientation’ – whatever that means!, then on Friday he finally starts school. I am of two minds about the whole ‘bus’ thing. I should dearly love to ride the bus with him, at least at the beginning, but I don’t think that they have things set up for that and besides, if I did ride out there I would need to take Xander and we would need a way to get back. Sigh. But I would really rather he had one ‘new’ experience at a time. Seems like an awful lot of ‘newness’ to be riding the bus and starting school for the first time all on the same day. Maybe I am being over protective as one person is constantly telling me. Sigh. I just don’t know.
On an entirely different note, I do have a few stories to tell. The first one is just plain funny.
The other day, while Jason worked seriously on building Axonn (A bionicle creature from the Legos universe), Xander sat at the dining room table ‘drawing.’ He is my artist child – loves play dough and painting and drawing. He’d been working a bit when he called to me (I was in the kitchen, cleaning as usual!): “Mommy, draw me purple boon!” “You want me to draw a purple balloon?” “Yep!” “Okay” So, like the dutiful mom I am, I walked out and drew him a purple balloon then went back to cleaning. A moment later, “Mommy, draw me new purple boon.” “You want a new purple balloon? Why? I just drew one!” “That one popped.” I think my jaw must’ve dropped. A purple balloon drawing had popped? But I am well trained so out I came and drew the balloon. He considered it for a long moment then “Draw Xander crying because purple boon popped, pease Mommy?” So I drew Xander crying. He nodded, consideringly. “Now draw Nani hugging Xander crying because he purple boon popped.” Ummm…. I did so. He was satisfied with his storyboard and went back to his own work, all the while talking to his drawings confidingly. I just shook my head and laughed and went back to my own work.
The next story is not so much funny as realistic… Poor Xander has been quite sick these past couple of days. Just three days (or nights, more accurately!) ago, I was up eight times – first with Jason at 9:30. (He’s been having nightmares.) then from about 10 pm on with Xander. The littlest one has had a horrendous cough. And that cough was so bad that his naps suffered – first it diminished from 1 ½ hours – 2 hours down to 45 minutes, then, on the following day, that collapsed to 15 minutes. He was coughing so hard, and choking with it, that he just couldn’t sleep. And, as you might imagine, that left him desperately tired and very fragile. That second night, we got the boys to bed by 7:30 – both of them were so tired that they fell asleep within 10 minutes of lights out. But at 8 pm, Xander began to cough. As I listened to him on the monitor, I began to really worry. His breathing, when he wasn’t coughing, sounded horrible. Worried both about him and about the possibility that his coughing would wake Jason, I went in and collected him. He was so very asleep that he didn’t wake, even though he was coughing so hard that his body was shaking with it. Even when I took his temp, he did not wake. There was no fever, thank heavens, so pneumonia was less of a concern. But as I carried him back to our bedroom and lay down with him, I was listening to the quality of his cough. He sounded like he was choking on liquid, and swallowing in-between coughs in an attempt to deal with it. Lying there, in the dark, as that hot little body coughed and shook against my own, it suddenly hit me. He was refluxing. It had been awhile since last I had him on the Prevacid. I had thought that the reflux was done with. Most children outgrow it by there second year. Yet here was a sound that I recognized. The next morning I fed him his first dose of Prevacid and at nap time I gave him tyleonol (he was fussing at his ears). That day, yesterday, he slept 2 ½ hours. Last night he slept from 8 until 10 before he had a coughing fit but after that fit, he did not have another. And though he has had a couple of minor ones today, he seems to be doing a whole lot better. Xander has his two year check on Sept 15 so, barring a series relapse, I think I shall just keep him on the Prevacid and we will see how it goes. What coughing he has been doing has sounded more *normal* (i.e. without the choking sound) than previously so I am assuming that it is a reaction to the irritation caused by the reflux. I am kicking myself fairly hard today, however. I remember reading that ‘silent reflux’ – that is, the type that doesn’t result in the baby/child/adult spitting up, the type where the fluids simply come up the throat and are swallowed, has been implicated in the development of asthma. I should, no doubt, have been more proactive, should have kept him on the Prevacid. I didn’t because I just hate the thought of filling that little body with poisons – and that, after all, is precisely what medications are – judiciously administered poisons, perhaps, but poisons nonetheless. Ah well… hindsight is 20/20, or so they say.
On the other hand, good news: Matt and Maggie have had their third child. Judah Kyrios McKnight was born two days ago by C-Section. Ky has been welcomed happily into his family. His sister, Hope, has been telling all who will listen how she is now a ‘double big sister’ and Zach is busily defending his brother’s name. (Apparently the ‘dults were having a discussion regarding nicknames and Zach became quite vocal in his brother’s defense ‘He already HAS a name. He is baby Judah!’ So there! Aren’t two year olds wonderful?)
Labor Day
How weird! It is labor day. Tomorrow Jason goes in for his ‘assessment’, then on Thursday he has his ‘orientation’ – whatever that means!, then on Friday he finally starts school. I am of two minds about the whole ‘bus’ thing. I should dearly love to ride the bus with him, at least at the beginning, but I don’t think that they have things set up for that and besides, if I did ride out there I would need to take Xander and we would need a way to get back. Sigh. But I would really rather he had one ‘new’ experience at a time. Seems like an awful lot of ‘newness’ to be riding the bus and starting school for the first time all on the same day. Maybe I am being over protective as one person is constantly telling me. Sigh. I just don’t know.
On an entirely different note, I do have a few stories to tell. The first one is just plain funny.
The other day, while Jason worked seriously on building Axonn (A bionicle creature from the Legos universe), Xander sat at the dining room table ‘drawing.’ He is my artist child – loves play dough and painting and drawing. He’d been working a bit when he called to me (I was in the kitchen, cleaning as usual!): “Mommy, draw me purple boon!” “You want me to draw a purple balloon?” “Yep!” “Okay” So, like the dutiful mom I am, I walked out and drew him a purple balloon then went back to cleaning. A moment later, “Mommy, draw me new purple boon.” “You want a new purple balloon? Why? I just drew one!” “That one popped.” I think my jaw must’ve dropped. A purple balloon drawing had popped? But I am well trained so out I came and drew the balloon. He considered it for a long moment then “Draw Xander crying because purple boon popped, pease Mommy?” So I drew Xander crying. He nodded, consideringly. “Now draw Nani hugging Xander crying because he purple boon popped.” Ummm…. I did so. He was satisfied with his storyboard and went back to his own work, all the while talking to his drawings confidingly. I just shook my head and laughed and went back to my own work.
The next story is not so much funny as realistic… Poor Xander has been quite sick these past couple of days. Just three days (or nights, more accurately!) ago, I was up eight times – first with Jason at 9:30. (He’s been having nightmares.) then from about 10 pm on with Xander. The littlest one has had a horrendous cough. And that cough was so bad that his naps suffered – first it diminished from 1 ½ hours – 2 hours down to 45 minutes, then, on the following day, that collapsed to 15 minutes. He was coughing so hard, and choking with it, that he just couldn’t sleep. And, as you might imagine, that left him desperately tired and very fragile. That second night, we got the boys to bed by 7:30 – both of them were so tired that they fell asleep within 10 minutes of lights out. But at 8 pm, Xander began to cough. As I listened to him on the monitor, I began to really worry. His breathing, when he wasn’t coughing, sounded horrible. Worried both about him and about the possibility that his coughing would wake Jason, I went in and collected him. He was so very asleep that he didn’t wake, even though he was coughing so hard that his body was shaking with it. Even when I took his temp, he did not wake. There was no fever, thank heavens, so pneumonia was less of a concern. But as I carried him back to our bedroom and lay down with him, I was listening to the quality of his cough. He sounded like he was choking on liquid, and swallowing in-between coughs in an attempt to deal with it. Lying there, in the dark, as that hot little body coughed and shook against my own, it suddenly hit me. He was refluxing. It had been awhile since last I had him on the Prevacid. I had thought that the reflux was done with. Most children outgrow it by there second year. Yet here was a sound that I recognized. The next morning I fed him his first dose of Prevacid and at nap time I gave him tyleonol (he was fussing at his ears). That day, yesterday, he slept 2 ½ hours. Last night he slept from 8 until 10 before he had a coughing fit but after that fit, he did not have another. And though he has had a couple of minor ones today, he seems to be doing a whole lot better. Xander has his two year check on Sept 15 so, barring a series relapse, I think I shall just keep him on the Prevacid and we will see how it goes. What coughing he has been doing has sounded more *normal* (i.e. without the choking sound) than previously so I am assuming that it is a reaction to the irritation caused by the reflux. I am kicking myself fairly hard today, however. I remember reading that ‘silent reflux’ – that is, the type that doesn’t result in the baby/child/adult spitting up, the type where the fluids simply come up the throat and are swallowed, has been implicated in the development of asthma. I should, no doubt, have been more proactive, should have kept him on the Prevacid. I didn’t because I just hate the thought of filling that little body with poisons – and that, after all, is precisely what medications are – judiciously administered poisons, perhaps, but poisons nonetheless. Ah well… hindsight is 20/20, or so they say.
On the other hand, good news: Matt and Maggie have had their third child. Judah Kyrios McKnight was born two days ago by C-Section. Ky has been welcomed happily into his family. His sister, Hope, has been telling all who will listen how she is now a ‘double big sister’ and Zach is busily defending his brother’s name. (Apparently the ‘dults were having a discussion regarding nicknames and Zach became quite vocal in his brother’s defense ‘He already HAS a name. He is baby Judah!’ So there! Aren’t two year olds wonderful?)
August 27
August 27, 2006
Home again, home again. Tom and I took the boys to the zoo. We had meant to take them to the Pacific Science Center – a place that Jason adores – but we agreed that since it doesn’t open until 10 am, it would be too much of a challenge trying to see it and get Xander home in time for his nap. As it turned out, even the zoo was a bit much. He woke this morning at 6 am – after having fallen asleep at 9! (Jason was gone by 7:30 but poor Xander. He didn’t like his sleeper, he needed to use the loo then he didn’t. He wanted Daddy hugs then Mommy hugs then the loo again… it went on and on until finally he pleaded with me to take him back into his room, sans sleeper. There he fell asleep in my arms and, once he was asleep, I dressed him and settled him in bed. He slept from 9 until 6 without a peep – a truly amazing feat since Jason had nightmares and spent a good portion of the night yelling!) He was a really tired baby. So…on the way home from the zoo, he fell asleep. I started to try to wake him and then decided against it. We came straight home and I maneuvered him into his own bed while Tom took Jason to go get lunch. Whew. But we did have fun. We saw the Jaguar going for his morning swim. We investigated the tropical rain forest and visited the gorillas and we went to the butterfly house. Xander was deeply disappointed that none of the butterflies landed on him this time. The last time we went, they were all over him. The keeper explained that we needed to come back when the butterflies were more active – around 1 pm. Sigh. Right in the center of his napping period AND too far away.
Anyway, Xander is now awake and munching his lunch. When he is done, we have a command performance at Tom’s folks’ house. They bought a grill and want to have a ‘breaking in’ ceremony for it. I wonder who all will be there? And I wonder what the condition of their house will be. They have been in the middle of a large renovation – redoing the ceilings and floors etc. The house has been torn up and in bits for the past several months. Not the most inviting space. Donna acknowledges that and spends as much time as she can away from the house. Such are the joys of home ownership, I guess. We are doing our own renovations – putting wood flooring into the bedrooms and building a raised rose bed in the front yard. Then there is the raised bed in the back that needs to be completed. Of course, all that costs time and money and we seem to have almost none of either these days. A common enough refrain, as I understand it. I begin to understand why people occasionally fantasize about childhood – it wasn’t really easier but the concerns were generally different and they didn’t usually involve taking care of a bunch of other people!
I did tell you, didn’t I? Xander’s new favorite phrase is: “You get back here right this minute, young man!” The scary thing is that when he says it, his speech is very clear and understandable. You should see the looks I get when he chirps it out in public. Why do people insist on looking shocked, I wonder. I could understand amusement but not the raised eyebrow looks I often get. With Jason, people just grinned. Of course, he didn’t chirp out phrases of that sort. Mostly he belted out songs. We would be going down a grocery store aisle and he would suddenly start on a verse of ‘Grand old flag’ or ‘Jingle Bells.’ One Christmas, when he was just over two, we were in Safeway and he started singing his version of Jingle Bells (You know it, no doubt: Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin lays an egg…) Anyway, we went past a mom with her three pre-teen sons and when they heard the song, they immediately chimed in. She just rolled her eyes and shook her head. Such is the life of boys.
I remembered another story about Jason – one both sad and funny. It was several weeks back. I was seriously exhausted – a combination of bad allergies, a bad chest cold, and lack of sleep because both boys were sick. I had asked Jason to do something over and over and over again and finally, completely at the end of my rope I screamed at him and grabbing his arm, dragged him to where I wanted him. Then I was horrified, shocked at my behavior. Shudder. It was bad. I sat down and started to cry and Jason came up to me and patted me on the back. “Its okay, mommy.” I said ‘No. It is NOT okay. You are a child. I am an adult. My behavior was inexcusable. I should NEVER behave like that with you, NEVER!’ He patted me again and said ‘It is okay, mommy. You didn’t do anything really bad. You should save up feeling bad for if you do something really stupid like let us run out in front of a car and get run over.’ GAAAKK! He hugged me and I was torn. I was still upset by my behavior but I was also stunned by his philosophical response. Sigh. What can you say to such a child?
The good news is that there hasn’t been a similar situation. Oh I still feel like I am going to go round the bend on occasion – especially when I have had a restless night – but for the most part I manage to maintain some semblance of sanity.
On a different note, I have been thinking and thinking about what to do to make a living. I am still shaking from the possibility of something happening to Tom, to his job. I need to create something to balance that. Relying on one income is just not safe. But the question is what? Tom says, with annoying aplomb, ‘I am sure that when you decide what you are going to do, when you set up your home business, it will be a great success.’ Thanks for the vote of confidence but that is not… helpful. I need to figure out what to do – and I remember my grandfather’s comment (he was a successful entrepreneur). He told me once that the most basic mistake that many would be ‘business’ owners make is that they do not have a five year financial cushion. ‘You need to be able to keep putting money in without expecting money out for at least five years.’ He told me. ‘It may be that you make money immediately. The wise person reinvests that money.’ I do not have a five year cushion, obviously, and until I have a plan I cannot begin targeting money for that cushion. So… I need to work on that. What I really ought to do, I know, is schedule myself the time – just make it a part of the plan. If I don’t, I shall never HAVE the time to do it. Ah well…
Home again, home again. Tom and I took the boys to the zoo. We had meant to take them to the Pacific Science Center – a place that Jason adores – but we agreed that since it doesn’t open until 10 am, it would be too much of a challenge trying to see it and get Xander home in time for his nap. As it turned out, even the zoo was a bit much. He woke this morning at 6 am – after having fallen asleep at 9! (Jason was gone by 7:30 but poor Xander. He didn’t like his sleeper, he needed to use the loo then he didn’t. He wanted Daddy hugs then Mommy hugs then the loo again… it went on and on until finally he pleaded with me to take him back into his room, sans sleeper. There he fell asleep in my arms and, once he was asleep, I dressed him and settled him in bed. He slept from 9 until 6 without a peep – a truly amazing feat since Jason had nightmares and spent a good portion of the night yelling!) He was a really tired baby. So…on the way home from the zoo, he fell asleep. I started to try to wake him and then decided against it. We came straight home and I maneuvered him into his own bed while Tom took Jason to go get lunch. Whew. But we did have fun. We saw the Jaguar going for his morning swim. We investigated the tropical rain forest and visited the gorillas and we went to the butterfly house. Xander was deeply disappointed that none of the butterflies landed on him this time. The last time we went, they were all over him. The keeper explained that we needed to come back when the butterflies were more active – around 1 pm. Sigh. Right in the center of his napping period AND too far away.
Anyway, Xander is now awake and munching his lunch. When he is done, we have a command performance at Tom’s folks’ house. They bought a grill and want to have a ‘breaking in’ ceremony for it. I wonder who all will be there? And I wonder what the condition of their house will be. They have been in the middle of a large renovation – redoing the ceilings and floors etc. The house has been torn up and in bits for the past several months. Not the most inviting space. Donna acknowledges that and spends as much time as she can away from the house. Such are the joys of home ownership, I guess. We are doing our own renovations – putting wood flooring into the bedrooms and building a raised rose bed in the front yard. Then there is the raised bed in the back that needs to be completed. Of course, all that costs time and money and we seem to have almost none of either these days. A common enough refrain, as I understand it. I begin to understand why people occasionally fantasize about childhood – it wasn’t really easier but the concerns were generally different and they didn’t usually involve taking care of a bunch of other people!
I did tell you, didn’t I? Xander’s new favorite phrase is: “You get back here right this minute, young man!” The scary thing is that when he says it, his speech is very clear and understandable. You should see the looks I get when he chirps it out in public. Why do people insist on looking shocked, I wonder. I could understand amusement but not the raised eyebrow looks I often get. With Jason, people just grinned. Of course, he didn’t chirp out phrases of that sort. Mostly he belted out songs. We would be going down a grocery store aisle and he would suddenly start on a verse of ‘Grand old flag’ or ‘Jingle Bells.’ One Christmas, when he was just over two, we were in Safeway and he started singing his version of Jingle Bells (You know it, no doubt: Jingle Bells, Batman smells, Robin lays an egg…) Anyway, we went past a mom with her three pre-teen sons and when they heard the song, they immediately chimed in. She just rolled her eyes and shook her head. Such is the life of boys.
I remembered another story about Jason – one both sad and funny. It was several weeks back. I was seriously exhausted – a combination of bad allergies, a bad chest cold, and lack of sleep because both boys were sick. I had asked Jason to do something over and over and over again and finally, completely at the end of my rope I screamed at him and grabbing his arm, dragged him to where I wanted him. Then I was horrified, shocked at my behavior. Shudder. It was bad. I sat down and started to cry and Jason came up to me and patted me on the back. “Its okay, mommy.” I said ‘No. It is NOT okay. You are a child. I am an adult. My behavior was inexcusable. I should NEVER behave like that with you, NEVER!’ He patted me again and said ‘It is okay, mommy. You didn’t do anything really bad. You should save up feeling bad for if you do something really stupid like let us run out in front of a car and get run over.’ GAAAKK! He hugged me and I was torn. I was still upset by my behavior but I was also stunned by his philosophical response. Sigh. What can you say to such a child?
The good news is that there hasn’t been a similar situation. Oh I still feel like I am going to go round the bend on occasion – especially when I have had a restless night – but for the most part I manage to maintain some semblance of sanity.
On a different note, I have been thinking and thinking about what to do to make a living. I am still shaking from the possibility of something happening to Tom, to his job. I need to create something to balance that. Relying on one income is just not safe. But the question is what? Tom says, with annoying aplomb, ‘I am sure that when you decide what you are going to do, when you set up your home business, it will be a great success.’ Thanks for the vote of confidence but that is not… helpful. I need to figure out what to do – and I remember my grandfather’s comment (he was a successful entrepreneur). He told me once that the most basic mistake that many would be ‘business’ owners make is that they do not have a five year financial cushion. ‘You need to be able to keep putting money in without expecting money out for at least five years.’ He told me. ‘It may be that you make money immediately. The wise person reinvests that money.’ I do not have a five year cushion, obviously, and until I have a plan I cannot begin targeting money for that cushion. So… I need to work on that. What I really ought to do, I know, is schedule myself the time – just make it a part of the plan. If I don’t, I shall never HAVE the time to do it. Ah well…
August 25
August 25, 2006
HAH! I am awake BEFORE THE BOYS! HAH!!! Of such things are the joys of the moment made. Of course, I have been awake, off and on, through out the night. Not sure what was going on but Xander woke at midnight, 1:30 and 3:30. Sigh. Then Tom, that miserable &*(@# woke up at his usual time, 4:30!!!! How dare he? (Yes, I am distinctly punchy at the moment, in case you hadn’t guessed.) I tried to pull the covers over my head but most of the them had migrated off the side and were trying, instead, to pull me with them! Facing the inevitable with eyes tightly shut, I rolled out of bed – thump, bump, hit the floor – felt that up through my feet! – and slogged off to the shower. Poor Tom has been told that he can’t take hot showers anymore (Dermatologist). I couldn’t stand that. How else is one supposed to get one’s eyes open in the morning? Oh, I know, one could go in the opposite direction – take icy cold showers. That will wake you up. (Grin, I remember the shortest shower my brother, Ian, ever took… he insisted on having a shower before we left the Adirondeck Mountains where we had been camping. The one up at the lodge was busy – lines of people waiting – and we needed to get on the road soonest. ‘Not to worry’ he told us in a lofty tone ‘I saw showers out in the woods.’ Now you have to ask yourself, why didn’t he wonder that no one else was using them? Did he just assume ignorance or stupidity on their parts? Ah well. Off he marched. About 10 minutes later he was back, hair still dripping. Without a word he climbed into the camper and growled ‘Okay, I’m done.’ Nobody said a word. Even we weren’t that fool hardy but later, when we figured he couldn’t hear us, Matt and I had hysterics. My father was sanguine. ‘Cold showers. Very effective.’) Anyway, not for me. I am a cat by nature. Love my comforts, thank you very much. No WAY am I taking cold showers when hot ones are available! So here I am. I have agreed to watch Chris today, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Should be interesting. What one can do with two children becomes much more difficult with three… especially if the third is not your own and therefore not aware of the family rules.
We did get the loaner car yesterday, by the by. It stinks of cigarette smoke and is still rather dirty but hopefully we will be able to get the Merc back today sometime in the late afternoon. The good thing is that the vehicle is large enough to carry all three car seats. Sigh. It is a truck, really. Xander and Jason were delighted. Do you remember when something that simple could give you great joy? I am not always sure that I do. I have my moments but there are times when I feel horrendously old – when I realize that I am so busy ‘taking care of things’ that I miss the simple pleasures. That is one thing that children are good at doing: recalling one to the simple moments.
The beach was a simple moment. I stood there, looking out across the storm tossed surf and felt the peace wash over me. It was loud there. A good loud. The sound of sea gulls was barely discernable against the breaking of the waves. The mists were cold and as I stood against the ocean breezes, I could feel all the tensions disappearing, sinking down into the sands. The ocean is good for me. It is my refuge. Always has been. In Hawaii, after a bad day dealing with Sanchia, I would go sit on the cliffs and watch the sea turtles dance. In Ireland, I would go down to the shores and laugh at the sight of the brave/foolish who had dared to swim the Irish seas. I believe in mermaids and the song of the seas. I have heard both. Reclining in a catamaran, piloted by an older Hawaiian gentleman, I heard the song and oh, the blue of it! It called and I very nearly went over the side into the sea. The captain grabbed my shoulder and when I looked at him in surprise said ‘I know that look.’ Oh for the blue of those waters again. The color was so rich it would stain your skin were you to swim in it. I miss the sea.
Jason also fell in love with the sea this time. He wants to go back again. Would that I could take him to the islands where he could actually swim in the water, where he could chase fishes and sharks and dance with turtles. Someday. Someday. Someday soon. I just have to figure the finances, is all! ‘I am collecting things for my aquarium’ he told me, a look of intense concentration in his blue eyes. ‘An aquarium?’ I said, slightly in shock. ‘We don’t have an aquarium!’ ‘Not yet’ he replied, with his sweet smile, and off on little boy feet he ran, scanning the shore for ‘items’ to collect. My mother laughed. Of course, she laughed. Everyone laughs at such things when they are not the ones facing them! Perhaps it is in sympathy… or perhaps in memory. I did have salt water aquariums as a child… And I have told Jason tales – about rescuing rainbow wrasses and lion fish. About banana prawns escaping. About epic battles between lion fish and eels. He comes by his desires honestly.
Xander was less interested in the sea itself (‘WET!’ he informed me seriously, pointing at the tide as it washed in.) and more in the seashore. (‘I be walk the seashore.’ He repeated to anyone who would listen. Then he would march down the sand, watching his foot prints disappearing behind him. At least once he tripped when a particularly interesting footprint filled with water and he turned halfway to watch. He collected rocks and shells and other interesting bits and Mommy carried his pail for him. ‘I be walk the seashore.’ He nodded satisfied. And when we left, he cried.)
HAH! I am awake BEFORE THE BOYS! HAH!!! Of such things are the joys of the moment made. Of course, I have been awake, off and on, through out the night. Not sure what was going on but Xander woke at midnight, 1:30 and 3:30. Sigh. Then Tom, that miserable &*(@# woke up at his usual time, 4:30!!!! How dare he? (Yes, I am distinctly punchy at the moment, in case you hadn’t guessed.) I tried to pull the covers over my head but most of the them had migrated off the side and were trying, instead, to pull me with them! Facing the inevitable with eyes tightly shut, I rolled out of bed – thump, bump, hit the floor – felt that up through my feet! – and slogged off to the shower. Poor Tom has been told that he can’t take hot showers anymore (Dermatologist). I couldn’t stand that. How else is one supposed to get one’s eyes open in the morning? Oh, I know, one could go in the opposite direction – take icy cold showers. That will wake you up. (Grin, I remember the shortest shower my brother, Ian, ever took… he insisted on having a shower before we left the Adirondeck Mountains where we had been camping. The one up at the lodge was busy – lines of people waiting – and we needed to get on the road soonest. ‘Not to worry’ he told us in a lofty tone ‘I saw showers out in the woods.’ Now you have to ask yourself, why didn’t he wonder that no one else was using them? Did he just assume ignorance or stupidity on their parts? Ah well. Off he marched. About 10 minutes later he was back, hair still dripping. Without a word he climbed into the camper and growled ‘Okay, I’m done.’ Nobody said a word. Even we weren’t that fool hardy but later, when we figured he couldn’t hear us, Matt and I had hysterics. My father was sanguine. ‘Cold showers. Very effective.’) Anyway, not for me. I am a cat by nature. Love my comforts, thank you very much. No WAY am I taking cold showers when hot ones are available! So here I am. I have agreed to watch Chris today, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Should be interesting. What one can do with two children becomes much more difficult with three… especially if the third is not your own and therefore not aware of the family rules.
We did get the loaner car yesterday, by the by. It stinks of cigarette smoke and is still rather dirty but hopefully we will be able to get the Merc back today sometime in the late afternoon. The good thing is that the vehicle is large enough to carry all three car seats. Sigh. It is a truck, really. Xander and Jason were delighted. Do you remember when something that simple could give you great joy? I am not always sure that I do. I have my moments but there are times when I feel horrendously old – when I realize that I am so busy ‘taking care of things’ that I miss the simple pleasures. That is one thing that children are good at doing: recalling one to the simple moments.
The beach was a simple moment. I stood there, looking out across the storm tossed surf and felt the peace wash over me. It was loud there. A good loud. The sound of sea gulls was barely discernable against the breaking of the waves. The mists were cold and as I stood against the ocean breezes, I could feel all the tensions disappearing, sinking down into the sands. The ocean is good for me. It is my refuge. Always has been. In Hawaii, after a bad day dealing with Sanchia, I would go sit on the cliffs and watch the sea turtles dance. In Ireland, I would go down to the shores and laugh at the sight of the brave/foolish who had dared to swim the Irish seas. I believe in mermaids and the song of the seas. I have heard both. Reclining in a catamaran, piloted by an older Hawaiian gentleman, I heard the song and oh, the blue of it! It called and I very nearly went over the side into the sea. The captain grabbed my shoulder and when I looked at him in surprise said ‘I know that look.’ Oh for the blue of those waters again. The color was so rich it would stain your skin were you to swim in it. I miss the sea.
Jason also fell in love with the sea this time. He wants to go back again. Would that I could take him to the islands where he could actually swim in the water, where he could chase fishes and sharks and dance with turtles. Someday. Someday. Someday soon. I just have to figure the finances, is all! ‘I am collecting things for my aquarium’ he told me, a look of intense concentration in his blue eyes. ‘An aquarium?’ I said, slightly in shock. ‘We don’t have an aquarium!’ ‘Not yet’ he replied, with his sweet smile, and off on little boy feet he ran, scanning the shore for ‘items’ to collect. My mother laughed. Of course, she laughed. Everyone laughs at such things when they are not the ones facing them! Perhaps it is in sympathy… or perhaps in memory. I did have salt water aquariums as a child… And I have told Jason tales – about rescuing rainbow wrasses and lion fish. About banana prawns escaping. About epic battles between lion fish and eels. He comes by his desires honestly.
Xander was less interested in the sea itself (‘WET!’ he informed me seriously, pointing at the tide as it washed in.) and more in the seashore. (‘I be walk the seashore.’ He repeated to anyone who would listen. Then he would march down the sand, watching his foot prints disappearing behind him. At least once he tripped when a particularly interesting footprint filled with water and he turned halfway to watch. He collected rocks and shells and other interesting bits and Mommy carried his pail for him. ‘I be walk the seashore.’ He nodded satisfied. And when we left, he cried.)
August 24
August 24, 2006
Still no word. Or rather, they discovered that the problem with the alternator was a blown fuse – much less expensive than getting a new alternator! Course I suspect that their discovery of the fuse came in part because Tom, who is, after all, a ‘failure analyst’, wanted to look at the part to determine the cause of the problem. The folks at Motorplex are well aware of Tom’s background and so they are generally very careful to check everything… However, we have not been able to get the car back in to get the other issues worked on as the loaner car that Motorplex owns is still out. It was supposed to have been returned several days back but has never reappeared. Hmmm… and then there is the recall – yes, Ford Co. has issued a recall on the Merc because of a failure in the cruise control – a failure which might cause the control to spontaneously ignite – even if the car is just sitting parked! Tom had made an appointment for me to take the car in this am at 10 BUT he had forgotten that the boys have swimming at 9:30 am. As this is likely to be the last session for Jason, at least for this year, I am not inclined to skip it. So we will have to, somehow, reschedule the inspection on the car.
Lord. I am tired. Boys have slept well the past two nights, thank heavens. Previous nights were not so good. But I am stressing – worrying about the car, worrying about Tom, worrying about all the commitments I have made – I am taking care of a friend’s animals while she and her family are off on a road trip. That mean that two times a day, once in the morning and once in the evening, I have to load the boys in the car and head over to her house. There I let the dog out to do his business and, while he does that, I go take care of the two cats. Yesterday morning, when I went into the house, I discovered that poor old Malcolm had had an accident – on the floor of Andrea’s bedroom and all down the hall. As I was starting to clean it up – and it was more a lake than a piddle – I heard Jason call ‘Can I come in, mommy?’ Thank heavens the child asked! ‘NO!!!’ I yelled, rather frantically. ‘DON’T COME IN!’ Malcolm, a pony sized dog, raised his shaggy eyebrows at me and hurried back outside. Hmmm…. That favor lasts until Sept 2 and then they will be back. I have also agreed to take care of Chris starting tomorrow through Wednesday. His mother has some ‘pre-work’ work to do. Sigh. I am impressed with people who can have and care for three + children. Just thinking about it exhausts me!
Of course, part of this stress is my nerves about Jason’s going off to kindergarten. He has announced that he will ride the bus to school (I will pick him up at noon). I am terribly nervous about that, I admit. I remember only too well the problems one can encounter on the bus. To my best knowledge, the only adult on the bus will be the driver – who will need to be concentrating on driving and will not be in a position to police the kids. In theory, at least, the littlest ones sit towards the front of the bus. We shall see. Moreover, Jason’s teacher is a new-hire which means that no one knows how good, or awful, she is. Jason goes in for ‘orientation’ and ‘assessment’ on Sept 5 and 7th. I have arranged for Donna to come and take Xander for me so that I can go and concentrate on Jason. He is quite casual about the whole thing, of course. Sigh… Mommy nerves strike again.
Tom took Mom off to the airport this am at 5 and Xander woke at 5:30. He will be wiped by the time swimming happens but… such is life. It was nice having Mom here though I cannot think that she had the best time. We were all quite sick – Tom was sick enough that he took the day off (the day she arrived) and slept in. He has to be really sick to do that – especially with all the work he has on his plate these days. He informed me recently that overtime is looking to become the norm – as Boeing gears up the 787 project they are pulling more and more people off other work and that means that those not tagged for the project are left to pick up the pieces. That means the next three years will be hectic and then?
Anyway, it was nice to see Mom and I know that we will all miss her. Xander especially, I suspect, as he had the pleasure of ‘waking’ Ama Pat in the mornings. Don’t ask me why but for some reason the child gets a real thrill out of waking people up. ‘I go knock Doorway.’ He announces. ‘I go wake up Ama.’ Or, when I have picked him up out of the crib and am heading out the door, he will say in a whisper ‘Mommy say ‘Shush Xander. No wake up BaBa.’’ Then, at the top of his lungs, he will yell ‘WAKE UP BABA!!!’ His speech is so weird these days – a mixture of clarity/precision and babyese. For example, we were walking up towards the library and he suddenly announced, very clearly, ‘Nemo Daddy say ‘NEMO – You get back here right this minute, young man!’’ An older man, walking back to his car, looked over with a grin and said ‘And I will bet he drove the car here too!’ I just sighed. On other occasions, he will say ‘I be, I be, I be…’ whatever the ‘I be’ is – perhaps ‘I be done’ or ‘I be want dat’. One never can tell with him.
And Ama Pat was willing to read to Xander – books that his parents had gone out on strike against. (He would willingly have certain books read and reread and reread on and on and on.) Yes, he will miss Ama Pat.
Jason will miss his grandmother too though his interactions with her were somewhat less. Jason is very physically active – up, down, and all about – and Mom is not so. Her hip has been really bothering her and that means she moves slowly and cannot get down on the ground and back up again easily. I
Just realized, after all this that I hadn’t told you the results of Xander’s blood work – everything came back normal – Thank god. The likelihood of Xander having Cystic Fibrosis was slim but that the spectre even lurked was sufficiently scary. So now we are back to not knowing why he is so vulnerable to sinus infections. One friend has the theory that it is environmental – that everyone is sicker these days and that that is because we have so polluted our air and water that it is nigh unavoidable. She may be right.
Oh dear. The painters are painting the front door and Jason and Papillion are providing assistance. I had better go intervene. Will write again in a bit.
Still no word. Or rather, they discovered that the problem with the alternator was a blown fuse – much less expensive than getting a new alternator! Course I suspect that their discovery of the fuse came in part because Tom, who is, after all, a ‘failure analyst’, wanted to look at the part to determine the cause of the problem. The folks at Motorplex are well aware of Tom’s background and so they are generally very careful to check everything… However, we have not been able to get the car back in to get the other issues worked on as the loaner car that Motorplex owns is still out. It was supposed to have been returned several days back but has never reappeared. Hmmm… and then there is the recall – yes, Ford Co. has issued a recall on the Merc because of a failure in the cruise control – a failure which might cause the control to spontaneously ignite – even if the car is just sitting parked! Tom had made an appointment for me to take the car in this am at 10 BUT he had forgotten that the boys have swimming at 9:30 am. As this is likely to be the last session for Jason, at least for this year, I am not inclined to skip it. So we will have to, somehow, reschedule the inspection on the car.
Lord. I am tired. Boys have slept well the past two nights, thank heavens. Previous nights were not so good. But I am stressing – worrying about the car, worrying about Tom, worrying about all the commitments I have made – I am taking care of a friend’s animals while she and her family are off on a road trip. That mean that two times a day, once in the morning and once in the evening, I have to load the boys in the car and head over to her house. There I let the dog out to do his business and, while he does that, I go take care of the two cats. Yesterday morning, when I went into the house, I discovered that poor old Malcolm had had an accident – on the floor of Andrea’s bedroom and all down the hall. As I was starting to clean it up – and it was more a lake than a piddle – I heard Jason call ‘Can I come in, mommy?’ Thank heavens the child asked! ‘NO!!!’ I yelled, rather frantically. ‘DON’T COME IN!’ Malcolm, a pony sized dog, raised his shaggy eyebrows at me and hurried back outside. Hmmm…. That favor lasts until Sept 2 and then they will be back. I have also agreed to take care of Chris starting tomorrow through Wednesday. His mother has some ‘pre-work’ work to do. Sigh. I am impressed with people who can have and care for three + children. Just thinking about it exhausts me!
Of course, part of this stress is my nerves about Jason’s going off to kindergarten. He has announced that he will ride the bus to school (I will pick him up at noon). I am terribly nervous about that, I admit. I remember only too well the problems one can encounter on the bus. To my best knowledge, the only adult on the bus will be the driver – who will need to be concentrating on driving and will not be in a position to police the kids. In theory, at least, the littlest ones sit towards the front of the bus. We shall see. Moreover, Jason’s teacher is a new-hire which means that no one knows how good, or awful, she is. Jason goes in for ‘orientation’ and ‘assessment’ on Sept 5 and 7th. I have arranged for Donna to come and take Xander for me so that I can go and concentrate on Jason. He is quite casual about the whole thing, of course. Sigh… Mommy nerves strike again.
Tom took Mom off to the airport this am at 5 and Xander woke at 5:30. He will be wiped by the time swimming happens but… such is life. It was nice having Mom here though I cannot think that she had the best time. We were all quite sick – Tom was sick enough that he took the day off (the day she arrived) and slept in. He has to be really sick to do that – especially with all the work he has on his plate these days. He informed me recently that overtime is looking to become the norm – as Boeing gears up the 787 project they are pulling more and more people off other work and that means that those not tagged for the project are left to pick up the pieces. That means the next three years will be hectic and then?
Anyway, it was nice to see Mom and I know that we will all miss her. Xander especially, I suspect, as he had the pleasure of ‘waking’ Ama Pat in the mornings. Don’t ask me why but for some reason the child gets a real thrill out of waking people up. ‘I go knock Doorway.’ He announces. ‘I go wake up Ama.’ Or, when I have picked him up out of the crib and am heading out the door, he will say in a whisper ‘Mommy say ‘Shush Xander. No wake up BaBa.’’ Then, at the top of his lungs, he will yell ‘WAKE UP BABA!!!’ His speech is so weird these days – a mixture of clarity/precision and babyese. For example, we were walking up towards the library and he suddenly announced, very clearly, ‘Nemo Daddy say ‘NEMO – You get back here right this minute, young man!’’ An older man, walking back to his car, looked over with a grin and said ‘And I will bet he drove the car here too!’ I just sighed. On other occasions, he will say ‘I be, I be, I be…’ whatever the ‘I be’ is – perhaps ‘I be done’ or ‘I be want dat’. One never can tell with him.
And Ama Pat was willing to read to Xander – books that his parents had gone out on strike against. (He would willingly have certain books read and reread and reread on and on and on.) Yes, he will miss Ama Pat.
Jason will miss his grandmother too though his interactions with her were somewhat less. Jason is very physically active – up, down, and all about – and Mom is not so. Her hip has been really bothering her and that means she moves slowly and cannot get down on the ground and back up again easily. I
Just realized, after all this that I hadn’t told you the results of Xander’s blood work – everything came back normal – Thank god. The likelihood of Xander having Cystic Fibrosis was slim but that the spectre even lurked was sufficiently scary. So now we are back to not knowing why he is so vulnerable to sinus infections. One friend has the theory that it is environmental – that everyone is sicker these days and that that is because we have so polluted our air and water that it is nigh unavoidable. She may be right.
Oh dear. The painters are painting the front door and Jason and Papillion are providing assistance. I had better go intervene. Will write again in a bit.
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